| Written by Thingfish,
on 17-06-2006 18:27
|
My brain has been infested by an insidious airworm - one that has been spreading rapidly across the Philippines blogsphere for the past week.
Alyssa Alano, a dancer with Filipino group Viva Hotbabes, joined a TV talent show recently, where she performed an outstandingly bad rendition of Kiss Me, by Sixpence None The Wiser. Not only did she sing badly, and strut her stuff with all the enthusiasm of a jaded go-go girl, but she sounded like she was making up the words as she went along.
According to the unattributable version of events that i've heard, the tune was too bad for broadcast (considering GMA's abysmal standards, that's hard to believe), and staffers sneakily added subtitles and uploaded the clip to YouTube.
Hard to say why this thing's taking off like it is, but Filipino
surfers are downloading it like nobody's business. Over the
past couple of days, the clip above has had over 20,000 hits per day.
That may not be much compared to Guy Goma or the Bus Uncle, but the
Philippines is not a country where many people have broadband. Most
people have dial-up modems at best - even some cybercafes still trundle
along on dial-up.
A sociologist might attribute the clip's popularity to the disconnect between the Filipino masses and the growing middle class. That the English-speaking educated class have latched onto the clip as a symbol of all that's tacky and hopeless in their country, that epitomises the cringingly crass game show culture that peddles shampoo, powdered milk and dreams to those legions of the urban poor. There's no shortage of theories out there.
Or it maybe it's just fun to watch people make fools of themselves. Why else would anyone watch TV talent shows?
But Alyssa may have the last laugh. Not only is that bloody song echoing around my cranium 24 hours a day, but many people are betting the episode will be a big boost to the club-footed dancer's career. And judging by the quality of her competition, they may just be right.
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Alyssa Alano
Keys Me
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Sixpence None the Richer
Kiss Me
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Keys me beat in the verdict valee
Nightlee, v-side the green green grass
Swing swing, swing the spinny stef
You vur the shoez and i will wear the dress
Oohoh, keys me, V-neat the milke twalay
Leeeeeeeeep me alout the moonlit floor
Leaf your open hand strike entebend end make di parflays dance
Sylvimousse is barkley
So keys me
Keys me down by the flow can 3-how
Twin vee oh funnee hungee, tay!
Bring bring, bring your flower head
Will take dachay make on your father's melt
Oohoh, keys me...
V-neat the milke twalay
Tixt me, alout the moonliiiiiit floor
Leaf your open hand strike entebend end make di parflays dance
Sylvimousse is barkley
So keys me
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Kiss me out of the bearded barley
Nightly, beside the green, green grass
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step
You wear those shoes and I will wear that dress.
Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand, strike up the band and make the fireflies dance silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me
Kiss me down by the broken tree house
Swing me upon its hanging tire
Bring, bring, bring your flowered hat
We'll take the trail marked on your father's map
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